Three Laughs

Due to John McCain’s backdrop being bright green during his speech, many people have superimposed their own videos due to chroma key technology. This really makes me laugh, and there are numerous youtube videos with interesting and humorous backgrounds for McCain’s speech.  Here are three of my favorite.

Can we say “monotone?”

As a theatrical director and acting coach - I would just like to say that the Republican Convention speakers should never be placed on stage.  They can’t speak, they have absolutely no stage presence, and certainly do not know how to read a teleprompter.  This is important in this day and age.  I am surprised at their inadequacy in public speaking.

Hillary does it again!

As much as I loathe Hillary, I must give her accolades for a very good speech tonihght at the DNC. She has to be, in my estimation, she is one of the best when it comes to giving speeches.

The Audition Process

I begin the process of auditioning actors today for my next play. It is often said the entire success of a show is in the casting. I think there is a lot of truth in this since it lays the foundation for the entire process. It’s often a balance of casting those who will require less work and attention from me and those that will require a lot. If the ratio of “needy” actors is high in a cast, the show will go nowhere. In addition to this aspect of casting, a director must look at an actor’s height, weight, eye color, how they look next to other actors on stage, how they walk, how they stand, and their voice quality. One of the most important things for me to know is: are they able to follow my direction well? I look at everything from the way they fill out their audition form to the way they walk into the room. If an actor does not follow basic directions, then most likely they will be hard to work with later. The way an actor dresses is also often important to me - are they attempting to “sell” themselves, or do they just not care? Actors who are polite and courteous also get high marks. Actors who display any type of pretentious attitude during casting usually get marked off my list quickly. This seldom happens, and usually the one who have “attitudes are the ones without much talent. Casting requires a lot of skill, focus, and energy. Correction: the ability to cast well requires a lot of skill, focus, and energy.

Tonight begins the first round of auditions. Actors are required to present two contrasting monologues to not exceed 2 minutes for the entire audition. At this time I will evaluate their talent, skill, look, and see if they fit into any of the roles I am casting. I will then call them back the next day and have them read from the script in a less formal setting, often with other actors. This gives me an opportunity to give them specific direction and see if they can give me what I’m looking for in the role. It also gives me a chance to get to know the actors personally a little better to determine how they might “mesh” with myself and the other actors in the cast. This “meshing” of personalities is often defined as creating a strong “ensemble” of players. This can be very crucial to the success of a show. I intend to narrow my callbacks down to only the ones who I am very interested in casting. I will cast about 18 roles, and will see around 200 auditions. This means, I have to be very selective. My callbacks may include around 50-60 people for this production. Throughout the night during callbacks - I will be eliminating people as I go (though they will not know they have been eliminated until the cast list is posted).

One of the great aspects of directing a show for a University theatre program, is that the actors have received extensive training on how to audition professionally. They have been trained on how to present themselves in the best possible way that will show off their talents and skills. Amateur theatres (high schools, community theatres, and often church drama programs) seldom have many who know how to present themselves well. So there is a lot more guess-work involved on my part as a director. An amateur who does not audition well may be a very fine actor with several weeks of rehearsal. It’s often hard to know with amateurs who will be strong and who will be weak. With professional actors, you often see their best at an audition so you know what you’re getting.

One final thought (though I could on and on about this topic for days) is that a director must know the play they are casting inside and out.  I have to know exactly who the characters are, what they do, and how they fit into the play.  I usually spend a lot of time prior to auditions, compiling research, pinpointing the play’s themes, and studying the characters.  This enables me to know what I’m looking for as I cast the play.

I know many who read my blog are not “theatre” folks, so I thought I would give you a glimpse into a small part of what I do as a director. And now…it’s of to auditions!

Political Mistake of ‘08

Obama: You have GOT to be kidding? I thought you wanted CHANGE and were tired of the Washington insider “political” games? I thought you boasted your stance on NOT voting for the war in Iraq? Now, with Mr. Biden, you can’t claim these as your platform. Mr. Biden is the definition of Washington bureaucracy.  Wha-Happened?

Road Rants

Attention all drivers:  It’s called a “turn signal” or a “blinker”.  Check into it!

Guiltner for President ‘08?

I hear that Donald Trump is considering a run for office.  Since my hair is better, and now that I am 35 years old, perhaps I will throw my name in the pot. Weston and I have been assembling an exploratory committee. Here is a preliminary ad campaign.

Today, I turn 35.

Today, being my 35th birthday, calls for a special blog entry. I have asked my Mom and Dad to write a GUEST blog entry. I hope you enjoy it, and if any of my brothers or sisters have anything to add, please feel free to leave a comment.

REMBERANCES OF AUGUST 21, 1973

By: Jerry and Shirley Guiltner

Above: Photos of me about 35 years ago.

Mom’s view:

My physician, Dr. Shedd, was going to Europe and would be gone on my due date. I wanted him to deliver my fifth child so he said, “No problem. We’ll induce labor on the 21st.” Dr. Shedd had some other ladies whom he also induced on the same day.

Above: A current photo of Dr. Shedd

Since we had five other children at home, my Mom (Granny) and oldest sister (Dorothy) came to stay with them.

We were told to be at the hospital at 3:30 a.m. Try as we may, we couldn’t sleep, but we arrived right on time at the hospital in Paragould, Arkansas. I was given an injection to begin the labor process. And I started having contractions almost immediately, but no baby. All the other ladies who, by the way, were having their first child, had their babies early in the morning … I think by 9:00 a..m. all had given birth. But not me.

Finally, Dr. Shedd in a very aggravated voice told the nurses to move me to a room, make me comfortable and keep my contractions light. He had to go to his office across the street.

Jerry and I settled in a regular room. Somehow Granny and Dorothy showed up. I don’t know what they did with the other children.

I hurt all day long. The nurses kept checking on me and reporting to Dr. Shedd. Then late in the afternoon, I went into hard labor and they called for the Doctor as they hurriedly rolled me to the delivery room. (This is before birth in the rooms and Dads being on hand for the delivery).

Thankfully at 6:30 p.m. Clayton Wayne Guiltner burst on the scene screaming at the top of his lungs … all 7 pounds, 10 ounces of him!

Thirty-five years later, I’m still proud of him and I love you very much, Clay.

Dad’s Perspective:

Shirley has pretty much taken care of the particulars about what happened and when it happened. And it’s the way I remember it too. But, I do have a little to add.

Dr. Shedd had thought Shirley would be the first to deliver since this was her fifth child. So, we expected the baby to arrive probably before sunrise. You can imagine the frustration we both felt waiting for the little guy to make his appearance.

It was very difficult for me to see my wife suffer through labor pains for 15 hours. Not only was she worn out, but I was too. And yet, when I saw Clay for the first time, it was all worth it. I immediately forgot the strain and stress and reveled in the miracle of birth and having a son.

Oh, in those days, parents had to wait until their child was born to know if it was a boy or girl. So we had two sets of names picked … one for a girl and one for a boy.

I too am very proud of you Clay and I love you.

P.S. - We still aren’t sure what happened to Steve, Julie, Ken, Keith and Scott when Granny and Dorothy came to the hospital. I’m sure they weren’t left at home alone because we still had a house when Shirley and Clay left the hopital.

New Frames

I seldom wear eyeglasses. Mostly at night, after wearing contact lenses all day, I can be found wearing my glasses. Weston loves to grab glasses. He calls them “eyes.” A few days ago, he found “daddy’s eyes” in the bathroom drawer in their protective case. He grabbed them and promptly broke them.

Today I went to Pearl Vision to see if they could be repaired. They worked on them for about 30 minutes and reported back that they were beyod repair. Had it been my car it would have been declared “totaled.” The good news was that they were still under warranty and I was able to get replacement frames. They simply found my Ray Ban frames on their display, popped in my lenses and sent me on my way.

I have only had the glasses for a year, and they were not cheap. I was very glad that I was able to get them replaced without hassle. My warranty runs out on Saturday. Weston chose the perfect time to break them. A week later, and it would have cost me a lot of money.

Above: A picture of me taken last year with my new glasses.

HOORAY

I am probably one of the world’s worst spellers. It’s not that I don;t know how to spell actually, but more that I don’t know how to type. I type very fast and use my own system. My system includes mountains of misspelled words.  Luckily spell check catches most of them. At any rate, you may notice misspelled words in my blogs. Thank you for not commenting on them. It makes me feel like a smuck.

And just for the record, I learned (thanks to spellcheck) that hooray is spelled h-o-o-r-a-y. So….Hooray!!